How to Spend Your Valentime
by Ali Youel
Valentine’s Day. There are two groups that form on this national day of candy and flowers galore. Those who eagerly await the gifts coming from their loved ones, and those who dread the PDA, the affection, and, most importantly, people being happy with their significant others. Yuck. There are ways to get over the longest day in February, so here are some things to do instead of wallowing in your desolate solitude.
You can watch movies. Not any of the rom-com crap. Watch the Sharknado series and think, “Hey, at least I’m not jumping through the air into a shark with a chainsaw.” Or, you can binge-watch my personal favorite, Star Wars. Watch episodes IV to VI, maybe some Rogue One, and if you are incredibly desperate, you can watch the prequels. Or, you can sit in your bed, with some Hostess Cupcakes, and watch the entirety of a series on Netflix. There’s Planet Earth, a mesmerizing documentary series on our beautiful planet; or Criminal Minds, but don’t watch it if you’re home alone at night. Just a word of advice.
Also, you can hang out with some of your other lonely friends. Bake cookies, make hot cocoa, rant about life. Being with friends always makes the days when you are encircled by loving couples and happy people easier. Ew. If you are reading this article and you are one of the people I’m complaining about, don’t shove your love in our faces. We get it, you’re happy. Whatever.
I personally will be hanging out with my valentine, my dog. My dog is the best; he’s adorable, and he understands all of my issues. So if worst comes to worst, find a cute dog or cat and tell them about all the troubles in your love life. These are all solutions to make you feel better when surrounded by copious amounts of sickly hearts.
Don’t forget the best day of the year though. February 15th: the day all the Valentine’s candy comes on sale. You can wallow in loads of self-pity with half-priced chocolate and candy. Don’t self-loathe for too long, it gets better. I hope. For now, I will be anticipating the day after Valentines, to when I can sit in my bed, having a Star Wars marathon, encompassed by chocolate wrappers and used tissues in my BB-8 pajamas. So cheers to the weekend and a life of no lovers and no happiness!